It seems that God is more mysterious than not to me these days. I am navigating a (multi-year) season of life consisting of both more permission and more exposure to big questions about faith, humanity, and my own experiences than ever before. As someone who appreciates a linear, tangible approach to most tasks and decisions, I can’t say that I’ve found this new framework particularly comfortable.
I’m finding myself slowly rebuilding a new perspective about discomfort in general, and that process lends to the discomfort of unanswered questions as well. Just because I feel a (sometimes prolonged) moment of discomfort, it does not automatically imply that something is wrong, or that my needs have been neglected, or that I need to seek a remedy. In fact, a recent Psychology Today article points to significant research that proves “people who were encouraged to embrace the discomfort they felt in (those) situations were more engaged, motivated, persistent, and more open to important information.”
So my periodic lack of clarity about who God is, where he is, or what on earth he’s doing, doesn’t correlate with him not loving me or him abandoning me and those around me.
That may sound obvious to some, but if I'm honest with myself, it’s a reality that I have to continually re-ground myself in.
The God who created us understands that feelings such as discomfort and confusion, and sometimes even pain, may actually signal to our brains that there is reason to engage further, motivating us to tune in to whatever is on the other side of our experience. In a way, maybe it triggers feelings of desire and persistence in the sense that humans so often “want what we can’t have.”
This isn’t to say that God plays games with our emotions or our biology, but that he’s aware and intentional in leaving some aspects of himself beyond our human ability to decipher. He engages our sense of longing and curiosity as he perpetuates a dynamic relationship with his children, inviting dialog, questions, and growth. Where would we really be if we reached a point of “figuring him out?”
While pressing into the discomfort may help us to funnel it into fuel to motivate our pursuit of deeper knowing, it sure can hurt. How do we reconcile when that associated pain stems from mystery shrouding reasons for suffering, or seemingly unanswered prayers?
I sure wish I had a clean cut answer for that one. My only offering is an invitation to hold these questions in the companionship of one another, and cling to what he has revealed to us. We know that he promises Goodness (Romans 8:28). We know that he has wired us to need and rely on one another (Romans 12:5). We know that despite his ways being beyond our comprehension, he created us for closeness and communion with him (James 4:8).
I’m thankful for a community of people that create space for me to navigate the mystery, especially when it’s uncomfortable. I’m thankful for a Creator who wired me with intention, knowing my limits and providing resources to ground me when my feelings may spiral. In humility and earnesty, I’d invite you to join me in my quest to embrace the awe, the confusion, the beauty and the discomfort of God’s mysterious ways. May we engage the unknown with expectancy and not fear, trusting God knows our innermost thoughts and cares deeply for our hearts and our futures.
Isaiah 55:8-9
“For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,”
declares the Lord.
“As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts.”
About the Author
Britni is a quiet but fearless spirit who is earnestly seeking the beauty of the redemption that Jesus has personally determined for her life. Committed to the truth that listening breeds understanding and understanding results in compassion, she clings to the power of life’s stories. She has embarked on the venture of discovering her own story and lending an ear to the stories lived out in others and savors the trace of Jesus that is woven throughout them all. Currently, that journey has landed her in a balancing act between the role of wife, momma, and a mental health Care Coordinator.