I have learned a disturbing truth in my life (please, no laughing at me, some of us are slower learners!). That truth is that when things are going relatively well, or I am feeling overwhelmed, I tend to “shine” God on – either the “yeah, yeah, I got this God” or “leave me alone, I can handle it” syndrome. Then things come crashing down and I realize, often too late for a simple solution, that my not letting God in was not a great plan of action. It was really avoidance.
Recently I have been in this mode and I actually caught myself thinking “things are not chaotic, I seem to be in my comfort zone and it is actually boring, so it's ok, God I've got this.” What brought me up short was our Sonship study this week. It's on THANKSGIVING! God is so faithful, so determined to continue my (and all of His children's) growth in His Spirit that He interrupted my studying and as I turned to Him in truly thanking Him, I began to see the pattern in my behavior. I was once again “shining Him on,” avoiding His Lordship in my life. I had been involved in busy work, you know, a TV show, a book I was reading, even housework, but I was avoiding that connection with God.
I love Him so much and am so grateful that He sees me and is invested in my life, and will bring me around to where He knows I belong; physically, emotionally, and spiritually. He doesn't give up on me.
“If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness (moral wrongfulness).” 1 John 1:9
So, there you have it, my experience from ignoring God to, through thankfulness, repenting and turning to Him for forgiveness and a restoration of relationship. How many times in the future will I need to go through this? I don't know. I do know the One who will be there to get my attention, pick me up, dust me off and set me on the right path.
I hope this is an encouragement, God knows where each of us are in our walk with Him, He knows what each one needs, when we need it, how we need it, and how to get our attention. He has a plan for each one. He loves us.
“For I know the thoughts and plans that I have for you, says the Lord, thoughts and plans for welfare and peace and not for evil, to give you hope your final outcome." Jer. 29:11 (Amp)