As parents of a five and eight year old, we are in a season of fielding a constant barrage of questions. While we are grateful to have graduated from the mind-numbing series of “but why?” posed by our kids when they were in their toddler years, the questions brought to the table now are a different sort of difficult. Our kids are of the ages where they have begun to notice where their little world may end, and that there are diverse, interesting, and sometimes strange things that lay beyond it. Stories on the radio, conversations at school, and sites seen out of the car window pose inquiries that can quickly get complicated.
“Why do some people not have homes?”
“Why are men paid more than women?”
“Why is that person talking to herself?”
“Why does this boy act differently in my classroom?”
Mike and I are aligned in our parenting approach, with the goal of being transparent yet gentle with our children–providing intentional responses to their questions, even when sometimes that means us just responding with more questions. But geez, it sure is tempting to just reply with a “you’ll understand it when you’re older” and move on with our day of snack time, Legos and basketball practice.
The conversations prompted by our curious kiddos’ minds can often grow into beautiful opportunities for learning and refinement, for all four of us. Mike and I are challenged to look honestly at what we believe and why and to understand how to invite our children to weigh-in with their own perspectives, feeling their fresh eyes and honest opinions often shifting our angle a bit.
In reflecting on how the Church may engage with the complex discussion of embracing unity within an era of such division, it struck me that the ways we try to ground our responses to our childrens’ tough questions might also provide some strategy for how we can respond as adults:
Practice curiosity. Take time to be curious about ourselves and our own responses to the thing in front of us that seems different. Consider the other humans involved and be curious about their life experience and wisdom. They likely have something to teach us. When we notice that woman using a wheelchair, we wonder what she has learned about the world while viewing it from a seated position, and consider what we might be able to gain from hearing and honoring her perspective.
Acknowledge resiliency. When we witness a divergent point of view or a scenario that doesn’t seem black and white, look for where strength and growth has developed. When we experience a person or peoples’ story that’s different from ours, where can we recognize the resilience that has enabled them to navigate hardships and withstand suffering? A life that is different from ours isn’t one to be pitied or looked down on, rather it can paint another picture of how God has wired humankind to be resilient and available for redemption. When we notice that a brown-skinned man wasn’t selected for the job that he appeared to be well-qualified for, we don’t respond with pity or shame. Rather, we position ourselves to learn about his experience, we acknowledge his strength and resiliency, and we follow his lead for how we can partner in correcting the culture and system we live within.
Celebrate diversity. Upon noticing our curiosity and exploring the questions posed by our kids or ourselves, we celebrate the richness and breadth of God’s created beings. While we commit to learn and be a part of repairing, we enjoy the beautiful mosaic that humankind is. And it’s the contrasting experiences, perspectives, skills, opinions and appearances that hone our own colors and contribution to this work of art. When we encounter someone with political and social views that differ from our own, we can take the opportunity to understand how their ideas might contrast our own in a way that prompts self-reflection and conviction.
Paul’s words to the Corinthians that compare the Church to the body of Christ are often used when thinking about the concept of unity. It’s a useful and poignant illustration to consider how we all work together as unique body parts to join the same work, of the body of Christ. I’m challenged to read this passage in a different way, convicted by this guidance I find myself providing to my children. While I’ve traditionally understood each body part to be in reference to the various “gifts” and skills that Jesus-followers might contribute to the greater Work, I wonder if we might view each part as a diverse expression of humanity. What would the Body of Christ be capable of, if one arm was composed of those with a low socio-economic standing, one toe was individuals raised in a conservative, mid-western culture of the United States, an elbow made up of indigenous tribes, and the neck was those who have overcome generational trauma? Or more simply put, what if each body part was represented by a different race or ethnicity? Is it still possible to understand ourselves as one part of a unified body?
Paul encourages us to find each part as necessary, with extra care given to the parts regarded as “less honorable” and all seen as unified by the same Spirit. May we live in pursuit of this picture as we walk forward in curiosity, resilience, and diversity.
1 Corinthians 12:12-27 NLT
12 The human body has many parts, but the many parts make up one whole body. So it is with the body of Christ.13 Some of us are Jews, some are Gentiles, some are slaves, and some are free. But we have all been baptized into one body by one Spirit, and we all share the same Spirit.
14 Yes, the body has many different parts, not just one part. 15 If the foot says, “I am not a part of the body because I am not a hand,” that does not make it any less a part of the body. 16 And if the ear says, “I am not part of the body because I am not an eye,” would that make it any less a part of the body? 17 If the whole body were an eye, how would you hear? Or if your whole body were an ear, how would you smell anything?
18 But our bodies have many parts, and God has put each part just where he wants it. 19 How strange a body would be if it had only one part! 20 Yes, there are many parts, but only one body. 21 The eye can never say to the hand, “I don’t need you.” The head can’t say to the feet, “I don’t need you.”
22 In fact, some parts of the body that seem weakest and least important are actually the most necessary. 23 And the parts we regard as less honorable are those we clothe with the greatest care. So we carefully protect those parts that should not be seen, 24 while the more honorable parts do not require this special care. So God has put the body together such that extra honor and care are given to those parts that have less dignity. 25 This makes for harmony among the members, so that all the members care for each other. 26 If one part suffers, all the parts suffer with it, and if one part is honored, all the parts are glad.
27 All of you together are Christ’s body, and each of you is a part of it.
About the Author
Britni is a quiet but fearless spirit who is earnestly seeking the beauty of the redemption that Jesus has personally determined for her life. Committed to the truth that listening breeds understanding and understanding results in compassion, she clings to the power of life’s stories. She has embarked on the venture of discovering her own story and lending an ear to the stories lived out in others and savors the trace of Jesus that is woven throughout them all. Currently, that journey has landed her in a balancing act between the role of wife, momma, and a mental health Care Coordinator.